Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
