Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
