her vagine was all disorganized.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
