Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
