69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
i now understand why vodka
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
