Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I'm sobbing to NWA
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
