At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
