first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Alive.
So much puke
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Randomize
