Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
there is puke in my bra ... again
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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