it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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