Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
