Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
