We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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