Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
