We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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