everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
