this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
