You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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