Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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