Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
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