My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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