what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
