I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
