it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
