Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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