I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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