As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
