I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
I just want nice things and good sex
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
