My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
