Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize