Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
