If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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