Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
i need some magic done to my vagina
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
