please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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