If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
