I feel like abortions should bother me more
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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