She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
