i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Is it penis luge time yet?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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