quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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