btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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