Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
