I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
