I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
home. puking in laundry basket.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
