No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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