That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
