There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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