I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
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