How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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