So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
