That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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