Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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