I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Randomize
