Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
